Me: "I better not see you sticking things through the back of the fan again. Got it, Pal?"
Jon: "Got it. Maybe you shouldn't look at me and the fan for a little while..."
"That french toast smells like Costco! The muffin part, not the tire part."
Jon: "Those roses are pretty."
Me: "Those aren't roses. They're called hibiscus flowers."
Jon: "Biscuits are things we eat, not flowers Mom."
"MOM! That is NOT how you hold an invisible baby!"
"These cherries are yummy, they taste like Zyrtec!"
From inside the men's room:
"MOM! You gotta come see these toilets! They're clear up on the wall! And they're RECTANGLES! Come in here for a second!"
"I can't wear this underwear, it's not fast enough for me to save people. I need the ones with lightning on them so I can rescue someone if they need me."