J: "Mom, is this Subway also a church?"
M: "No, why?"
J: "Those guys just said 'Amen.' Maybe they don't know it's not a church. Maybe you should tell them."
J: "Is that guy real? Because his leg's not. Look. Plastic."
M: "Yes, he is real. He had a big owie and they had to take his leg off and give him a plastic one so he could walk."
J: "I don't think he's real. Let's ask him..."
M: "LET'S NOT."
"I'm glad we're home. I like the toilets here better."
J: "How come you're not eating supper, Mom?"
M: "Because I have a tummy ache today."
J: "Oh. I had that before. What kind of chap-stick did you eat?"
"You have to fix my sleeves, Mom. Look. They're all jacked up."
J: "Why did you yell at those big boys?"
M: "Because they were talking naughty and being mean."
J: "Why did they do that?"
M: "Probably because their mommies aren't around and they think it's ok to be big jerks when they're by themselves."
J (in awe): "When I'm big, I'm going to be a big jerk and swear too. I can't WAIT."